


Hallelujah (Destiel)

by 21PilotsDead



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bisexual, Gay, Gay Sex, M/M, Religion, Religious Guilt, Romance, Self-Discovery, Sexuality, Smut, Supernatural - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-04-30 12:16:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5163500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/21PilotsDead/pseuds/21PilotsDead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas is 16 years old and going to public school for the first time. Coming from a very religious family Cas is shocked by the students, especially one in particular - Dean Winchester who is openly bi. Cas goes into a tailspin regarding his own sexuality, all while trying to convince Dean that being queer is a sin. But maybe he won't be so successful with that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1 - First Day of School

Castiel Novak was nervous, his palms were slick with sweat and he picked at his bitten fingernails anxiously. He was also excited, his heart was racing and he had to make a concerted effort to keep his face from lighting up too much. He didn’t want to look like a grinning idiot on the first day of school, he wanted to look cool, calm, and collected. It was his first day of school ever and he was sixteen years old. How was that possible, you ask? Castiel had been homeschooled for the first sixteen years of his life, his mother had been his teacher, his siblings were his classmates. His parents had homeschooled him to keep him away from the dangers of public lest he be taught about such things as witchcraft, sodomy, or evolution. To say that Castiel’s family loved Jesus was an understatement, they were devout Christians. Castiel's father was a preacher.  
His father was a strict man with a tight lipped smile that somehow managed to give off the aura of someone who was both warm yet also intimidating. He ruled his family with an iron fist and expected obedience but he was not unkind. He loved his family with his whole heart and when in a pleasant mood always had a new joke to tell. Castiel’s father really shined when he was preaching though. All eyes raptly on him, he spoke with a confidence that was unknown to Castiel. Castiel had idolized his father since childhood, wanting nothing more than to be just like him someday.  
It had taken Castiel just over a year of begging his parents to let him go to public school before they finally acquiesced. From the small amount of TV that he’d seen in his life high school looked like so much fun. There were people there, actual people that weren’t related to him or didn’t just want to be friends with him because his dad was the preacher at their church. There were people, and clubs, and sports, and teachers. It was a whole world that was strange to him but so alluring. With the promise that he’d use this as an opportunity to bring the word of Christ to more students he was finally allowed to go. But now that he sat on the school bus (another new experience for him) he was slightly more nervous about the experience. He hoped people would like him, he wanted to make friends so badly. He was dressed up in his best clothes, a nice crisp white shirt, and blue tie and his Sunday dress pants. Over that he wore a khaki trench coat just like the one his father wore. It made him feel much older than he was and more confident.  
He had a brand new backpack on his back stuffed full of blank notebooks and fresh pens and pencils, he was ready to learn. His blue eyes peered out the window as the bus drove along, watching as each student got on the bus and took a seat with their friends. Castiel sat alone but he was sure that by tomorrow he’d have a friend to sit with as well. Finally they neared the school, a large brick building that stood forebodingly under the grey overcast of the day. Castiel had memorized where all of his classes were when he came to orientation that summer. He’d been fascinated by the other students at orientation, so much so that he forgot to actually try and interact with them. He found their interactions to be strange and awkward, he didn’t quite understand why they all had to be so loud. He hypothesized that perhaps some of the students may have had hearing difficulties and that the other’s spoke at an above average volume to be accommodating.  
The bus stopped in front of the school and he rose to depart from the bus. He so eager to be off the bus and get into the school. He stepped down from the bus and walked briskly past all the other students who were straggling along, to the main entrance. The lobby was packed with students lounging around in various groups, talking, laughing, and being so loud. He stood amongst all this chaos and wondered what he was going there. He decided to head to his homeroom first, he didn’t want to be late that was a big fear of his. He made his way through the winding maze of hallways until he found room 203, Mr. Neil’s room, he taught trigonometry but he wasn’t there yet. Almost all of the seats were already taken so he searched around until he found a free spot in the middle towards the front. He had just taken his seat when he heard a voice call out to him. He turned to the voice and saw that it belonged to some short kid with a beard and a snarky grin. “Nice jacket,” the boy called out.  
Castiel smiled thinking he’d received a compliment, not understanding the malicious intent behind the words. He smiled, “thank you.”  
The kid burst out laughing and so did all his friends who sat around him. “What’s up with you kid? Are you retarded or something.”  
Castiel frowned. That wasn’t a very nice word to use but he didn’t understand why the boy would be mean to him. He didn’t even know him. “I.. I don’t understand.”  
“Oh fucking Christ he is retarded,” the kid said chuckling.  
Castiel’s breath was taken from him. That boy had just taken Jesus’ name in vain and he’d swore. He had been warned by his father of things like this occurring but he didn’t know it would happen so soon.  
“Aw go easy on him Crowley,” another kid said. “He’s obviously a little slow in the head.”  
“Yeah even I won’t stoop so low.”  
The boy who Castiel now knew to be called Crowley turned away from him and back to his friends. Castiel stared down at his desk and took noticed of a phallus and a swastika drawn on the desk. He drew in a deep breath to try and calm himself and clasped his hand under the desk to pray. He wondered what kind of place he’d gotten into. Had he made a mistake wanting to come to school?


	2. Chapter 2 - Lunch Time Promise

“Hey trench coat, mind if I sit here?” a voice asked Castiel.  
Castiel looked up and was met with these startling green eyes, he was dumbfounded for a moment but managed to nod in response. The boy sat down across the table from him and tore into a brown paper bag containing a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The boy took a bite of the sandwich and was halfway through the sandwich before he looked up and met Castiel’s eyes.  
“Oh hey yeah sorry dude. I’m Dean by the way.”  
“Hello Dean, my name is Castiel. It’s great to meet you.”  
“Yeah definitely. I was new here last year and I recognize the awkwardness of sitting alone on the first day so I thought I’d come spring you.”  
“That’s so nice of you.”  
“Dean doing something nice, damn you must be special,” a rambunctious redhead teased as she sat down next to Dean at the table.  
Castiel looked slightly startled at the redhead’s abrasiveness but managed to hide any shock from his face. “Shut your piehole Charlie, I’m a great person.”  
“Yes I apologize, Dean Winchester is the best person ever,” Charlie responded her voice dripping with sarcasm.  
“Finally you speak the truth.”   
“Aren’t you going to introduce me to this blue eyed beauty in the killer outfit Deanie Weenie.”  
“Oh but of course, where are my manners. Castiel this here is the superbly annoying but oddly endearing Charlie Bradbury resident nerd of the school. Charlie this here is Castiel and he’s new so be nice and welcoming.”   
“Hey there Castiel,” Charlie said cheerily as she waved excitedly at the new boy.  
“Its great to meet you Charlie.”  
Several more people came to sit at the table, a small asian boy named Kevin who was quiet but had a kind smile. He was followed by a freakishly tall freshman who turned out to be Dean’s younger brother Sam. A perky blonde girl named Jo who wore a leather jacket that was really sweet but you knew was a badass by the way she held herself. Then came Benny this lumbering bear of a man with a full beard who had the the brightest smile and a light hearted laugh, he was a senior. Finally the last addition to the table was an awkward gangly looking boy named Garth.   
Introductions were made and everyone seemed to Welcome Castiel who was a bit awkward around so many people but was pleased to be included. His spirits began to rose and he was thankful that they made an effort to include him in their conversation.   
“So Castiel where did you go to school before?” Jo asked looking him straight in the eyes and giving him a kind smile.  
“I was home schooled before this,” Castiel replied curtly.  
“Whoa so is this your very first day of public school ever?”  
“Yup.”  
“Wow, so how are you liking it so far?”  
“It’s a lot to take in. Before I met you guys it wasn’t going so great. Some boy who I presume to be named Crowley made fun of my appearance and called me slow in the head even though he has no knowledge of my intellectual capabilities.”  
“That’s just Crowley, he’s a big bag of dicks.”  
Castiel blanched a little at her use of language but tried to remind himself that this was normal in public school. He didn’t think he’d ever really get used to it though.   
“Hey you don’t really have to worry about Crowley anymore, now you’re with us so he won’t bother you,” Dean piped up.  
Castiel looked touched and smiled gently, “thank you so much.” Those green eyes stared at him for just a second too long and he felt himself getting lost in the color for a moment. The green that made up his eyes had tiny flecks of amber in them and made his eyes sparkle in a unique way. It lasted only a second before the green eyed boy broke eye contact looking back down at the table. Castiel snapped out of it and stared back down at his school lunch which had been rather disappointing.  
Just then the bell rang and everyone stood up to go to their classes. It turned out that Castiel had study hall with Sam and Kevin so the three of them walked there together, Kevin and Sam talking quietly about some video game and Castiel listening interested even though he understood very little of what they were saying. Castiel’s mind had been sated slightly, now that he had these new friends perhaps high school wouldn’t be so bad after all. He really was so excited to have friends.


	3. Chapter 3 - Second Day of School

The next morning was very different from the previous one in that Castiel was much more calm as he rode the bus. The day before had been a bit of a reality check but he wasn’t as nervous either. He knew what to expect now and was able to mentally prepare himself for the upcoming day. Plus there were his new friends. Was it too soon to consider them friends? Perhaps they were just sitting with him out of pity and didn’t really consider him to be part of their friend group. Castiel didn’t want to be presumptuous and assume this and then have a mockery made of him. But he really did want to be friends with this interesting group of people.   
Charlie seemed so kind and energetic, she had a lot of passion for the things she liked and Castiel found it to be endearing. Sam and Kevin seemed to be an inseparable pair, both always huddled together discussing either video games or school work. Despite this they both were very kind to him and went out their way to include him in the discussion even though he was ignorant of most of what they discussed. Benny was large and apparently on the football team but didn’t really get on well with his teammates which is why he sat with them, Dean and him were good friends. The reason why Benny didn’t get along with the football team he played for was unknown to Castiel but he didn’t want to pry and ask why because it seemed to be a sensitive issue.   
Then there was Dean. He had been the first person who’d reached out to him on the first day of school as he sat there all alone. Dean was complicated to Castiel, he was extremely warm and inviting. He didn’t act too seriously and loved to joke around with everyone. But his eyes were so mysterious, they held secret and maybe even hardship. The color of them was interesting to Castiel, green unlike he’d ever seen before. They captivated him and he didn’t really understand why.   
As Castiel walked into school that day and entered the craziness that was the lobby. He was surrounded by a sea of people and this wasn’t any less overwhelming than it had been the day before. Just as he thought he might drown in the sea of strange faces, a face that was known to him appeared like a life raft. It was Charlie. She walked up to him pushing through people with absolutely no regard for personal space until she made it to him. “Hey Castiel, you look a little lost so I thought I’d come save you.”  
Castiel smiled, a feeling of relief flooding over him. “Thank you Charlie. It’s so overwhelming, all these people. They’re so loud.”  
Charlie nodded agreeing with him. “Yeah what can I say? Public school kids are loud and obnoxious. Anyway who do you have for first period?”  
“I have math with Mr. Neal.”  
“Aw that’s lame. But luckily I’m right next door because I have biology with Mr. Allott first thing. C’mon pal let’s walk there together!” And with that Charlie hooked her arm through Castiel's and all but dragged him through the maze of hallways. It took Castiel a little bit by surprise but he couldn’t help but smile a little because Charlie’s optimism was contagious. As they walked she chattered on about this and that not really giving Castiel a chance to respond other than to nod his head with understanding. But this was fine with Castiel because he was more of a listener than a talker.   
Once they neared their separate classrooms they slowed down. Charlie’s arm let go of Castiel's and she waved at someone. Castiel looked up to see Dean standing outside of his first period classroom waiting. He smiled when he saw Charlie and Castiel approaching and waved back at them. Dean’s eyes briefly met Castiel’s before they flickered away. The same feeling that he felt yesterday at the lunch table flooded through Castiel. It was a foreign feeling, one that he didn’t understand so he didn’t dwell on it.   
The two stopped in front of Dean. “Hey Char, hey Cas. How are you guys?”  
“I’m amazing as always,” Charlie responded exuberantly. “How are you my friend?” Charlie asked in return.   
“Can’t complain. Not yet anyway. What’s up with you Cas?”  
Cas? No one had ever called him that before. His name was Castiel, not this strange shortened version of his name. His parents had always stressed to him the beauty and importance of his name. He was named after an angel, the angel of Thursday. Castiel knew his parents would hate someone ‘butchering’ his name. But in reality Castiel found himself liking his new moniker, it was short and sweet and if Dean wanted to call him that he really didn’t mind at all. In fact he even liked it.   
“I’m great. Excited for my second day of school.”  
Dean chuckled at the innocent almost child like way Castiel spoke of school. It was kind of strange but he found it refreshing, a reprieve the usual pessimism of teenagers. “That’s great Cas, I hope you have a better day. If Crowley gives you any trouble let me know and I’ll sick Benny on him. I mean Benny’s a gentle giant but he can be really fucking intimidating when he needs to be.”  
Castiel thanked Dean for the offer but just as he did so the bell rang signaling that all students must report to their first period class for attendance. So at this the three friends separated, Charlie and Dean heading to class together and Castiel walking into his class alone. He walked in and took the same seat as he had yesterday and took out his notebook and pencils to get ready for class. Crowley and his cronies sat over in their usual corner but they paid no mind to Castiel. For this Castiel was especially thankful for. This day was really looking up for him. He figured he’d really jumped to conclusions the previous morning. Public school was going to be great, he just knew it.


	4. Chapter 4 - Get Together

Castiel had to take a deep breath to calm himself as he walked up to the house. Specifically Dean and Sam’s house. They were having a get together that was very distinctly not a party because his parents would never let him go to a party. He’d had to beg to be allowed to come as is, and finally after being adequately assured that there would be no drugs, alcohol, or sex, they’d acquiesced. Castiel was just amazed that only a month into public school he not only had friends but was being invited over to one of their houses to hang out. There would be video game. Castiel had never played video games before.   
Despite all the excitement that he’d felt the week leading up to this event he was now feeling nervous. He was comfortable with his friends at school but now they would be in a different environment and maybe things would be different. Of course his anxiety melted away almost completely when Dean answered the door and invited him inside. Everyone one else was already there, lounging around the living room casually drinking soda and chatting away. When Castiel entered the room everyone greeted him, Charlie lept up from her spot on the couch and ran over to hug him with an enthusiastic little skip. “Hey Cassy.”  
“Hello Charlie,” Cas responded smiling shyly. He had quickly grown used to Charlie’s outgoing and exuberant personality. He still found it kind of strange how much she could talk, and how excited she got over seemingly mundane things, but he also found it to be endearing. Sensing that Castiel was unsure of what to do and where to sit, Dean motioned for Castiel to take a spot on the couch and Charlie pulled him down next to her. Sam and Kevin were sat in bean bags in front of the TV playing some sort of racing game. Both of them had intense looks on their faces and suddenly Kevin yelled ‘fuck’ when Sam’s car pulled ahead of him and won that round.   
“You fucking bastard, I hate you.” Kevin muttered bitterly under his breath and throwing down the controller in a huff of anger.  
“Aw Kev don’t be a sore loser. You don’t hate me, au contraire you love me.”  
“Shut up.”  
“Never.”  
“Okay boys,” Dean butted in. “Save the pent up sexual aggression for the bedroom. Not in front of our guests please.”  
Sam and Kevin both blushed scarlet red at Dean’s taunting which caused Dean a great amount of joy because he could knew they had a thing for each other but were too daft to do anything. It was just a plus that he loved to tease his brother unmercifully. Both Sam and Kevin jumped up from the bean bags and headed into the kitchen in search of food. This is when Dean took the opportunity to ask Castiel if he’d like to play a video game with him. Castiel nodded his head excitedly and took a seat in one of the bean bag chairs on the floor.   
“I don’t really know much about video games having never played them before.”  
“Don’t worry Cas, I’ll help you out man. I’ll even go easy on you, which I never do for anyone ever.”  
“Dean is a supreme asshole when it comes to video games. He’s way too competitive,” Charlie butted in complaining about her friend.   
“If you’re not first, you’re last.”  
“Winning isn’t everything,” Charlie responded somewhat bitterly.  
“Not for you, cause you barely ever win.”  
“Fuck off, Teach little Cassy here how to play the game and stop being mean to me.”  
“Okay,” Dean said turning his attention to his quiet new friend. “So you’ve got your controller. This button is what you press to make the cars go, this one will make it stop.” Dean said as he motioned to each one. “Then these here will allow you to turn left and right. Got it?”  
“I think so, it doesn’t seem too difficult.”  
“Okay here we go! You can be the blue car and I’ll be the green.”  
They started racing and it was apparent very quickly that no matter how easy Dean went on him that Castiel would not win the game. He raced the car about as fast as an elderly woman on her way to church on a Sunday morning would. Charlie was a good friend and tried to cheer him on and tell him to go faster. Castiel has such a look of concentration on his face as he stared unwaveringly at the screen before him. Sam and Kevin had walked back in the room at this point and sat watching the two. Finally Dean crossed the finish line ending the game in victory. He turned grinning to Castiel. “Sorry bro, I’ve got mad skills at this game you never stood a chance being a beginner and all.”  
Despite losing Castiel had a smile on his face. He shrugged at Dean’s words. “That’s okay that I didn’t win. This is a lot of fun, I enjoyed it a lot.” After this Charlie volunteered to play against Castiel and she was much kinder than him. She still beat him but not by as much because she purposely went a little slower. Castiel had a ton of fun playing but he decided he enjoyed watching Dean and Sam race against each other the best. There was a lot of shouting and profanity but it was extremely entertaining.   
Dean was victorious yet again and tackled Sam to the ground in an act of dominance until Sam admitted that Dean was better than him in every way and always would be.   
After he was done tackling his brother Dean plopped down onto the couch next to Cas and took a sip of his drink. “Have you been enjoying yourself Cassy?”  
Cas nodded enthusiastically. Dean could tell from the way the blue eyed boy’s eyes were shining and the corners of his mouth crinkled with a smile that he was. He knew that Castiel had never really gotten to hang out with people his own age like this before. He was glad that his parents had allowed him to come. Dean had even gone as far as clearing out all alcohol from view so that Cas wouldn’t feel uncomfortable or like he was lying to his parents about there being alcohol at the house.   
“I’m glad.” And Dean was really glad that the blue eyed boy was having a good time. It was really important to him. So damn important.


	5. Chapter 5 - It Says So In The Bible

Dean sat in the Impala which was parked outside of Castiel’s house. Castiel hadn’t really complained about the busride he had to take to get to school but he’d mentioned that it was rather long. Dean had jumped at the chance to give Castiel a ride to school, besides it really wasn’t so far out of his way. Despite this Charlie teased him mercilessly about having a crush the night before as they texted before bed. Dean was immediately defensive. I do not have a crush! He typed quickly into his phone and sent. I’m just picking him up for school and he only lives five miles away.   
Charlie replied. Sureeee whatever dude. I’m just saying I’ve had to walk to school in the rain because you wouldn’t come and get me.   
I don’t have a crush. Dean responded wanting to end the conversation and go to bed.   
Keep telling yourself that Deanie. Charlie said ending the conversation.   
Dean remembered the previous night's conversation as he sat waiting for Castiel to come out of his house. He definitely didn’t have a crush on the new kid. The new kid with the weird sense of fashion and the social awkwardness and the startling blue eyes and gorgeous tousled brown hair and the adorable smile and the--oh shit. Dean had a crush.  
Just then the front door opened and Dean watched as Castiel came jogging down the front steps with his backpack slung over one shoulder. He watched with wide eyes as Cas approached the passenger side of the car and hopped right in. “Good morning Dean,” Castiel greeted him in his deep yet amicable voice.   
“Good morning Cas, how are you this morning?”  
“I’m great! It was my turn to lead breakfast payer today and I was feeling quite inspired. It’s a great way to start off the day.”  
Dean, the huge atheist didn’t quite know how to respond to this so he spoke a mindless platitude. “That’s awesome.”  
“And thank you so much for the ride to school, I really appreciate it.”  
“No problem man, I’m glad to help you out.”  
The two drove to school in companionable silence with the sound of soft rock n’ roll on in the background. They walked into school together chatting mindlessly about their classes and Dean felt sad when he had to leave Castiel to go to his own class. Dean walked into the classroom and plopped down in his spot right beside his favorite nerdy redhead. He leaned over and made sure no one was paying them any mind before he spoke. “I think I have a crush.”  
“I fucking knew it!” Charlie exclaimed excitedly, practically jumping out her seat at the exciting gay news.   
“Keep it down would you, this doesn’t need to be broadcast to the entire fucking school.”  
“Oh calm down no one gives a shit. Besides I need to boast about how right I was. You were so defensive last night but I knew. My superior lesbian senses of perception never fail me.” Dean just shook his head.   
“It’s just a crush, it doesn’t mean I’m going to do anything about it. Cas is super religious I hate to say it but he’s probably not too fond of the gays or bisexuals like myself.”  
“Oh honey, just cause he’s religious doesn’t mean he’s homophobic. You know I do get some vibes from him, he could be one of us.”  
“Charlie I really don’t think he is. It doesn’t matter either way I’m not going to act on it. I value his friendship and the last thing I want to do is make him feel uncomfortable.”   
“Don’t worry Deanie weenie, your gay fairy godmother is here to work her magic.”  
“Charlie don’t you dare work any of your magic. Just forget I said anything at all, don’t make me regret telling you.” Charlie harrumphed and pouted silently as the teacher began his lecture. But in her head she was concocting plans to get those two boys together because it had to happen.   
The whole group was back together at lunch and the conversation around the table was heated. Benny and Jo were arguing about which football team was better. Dean sat smirking beside Cas who was baffled as to why two people could get so worked up over a sport. Dean knew it was just the usual. lunch time conversation but he got a lot of enjoyment out of watching the bemused and sometimes baffled expressions on his face.   
Finally Sam butted in telling them to shut the fuck up so that they could eat their lunch in peace. Benny sulked at being yelled at but shut up and it was comical to everyone to see a 6 foot tall two hundred pound eighteen year old pout. Jo laughed right in his face and everyone else joined in. Once the laughter subsided Charlie butt in with a question. “So any of you yahoos plan on going to the homecoming dance?”  
Everyone shook their heads and groaned on about how the dance was stupid. “I was thinking about asking that girl in my computer class, Ruby out because I heard she was pansexual.”  
“Good luck with endeavor Charlie, I have physics with her she’s really nice and I think you guys would get along,” Jo piped in. As they spoke Dean watched Cas’ confused expression as it soon phased into one of slight discomfort as he remained silent. Dean didn’t say anything until they were in the car on the way home. Sam had stayed after school with Kevin for robotics club so they were alone in the car. Cas’ voice was quiet as he spoke up. “Is it true?”  
“What?”  
“That Charlie is a homosexual?”  
“She’s a lesbian, yeah that’s true.”  
“But why? She’s a pretty girl she could get a boyfriend.”  
“It’s not about how she looks, that's just who she is. She was born that way.”  
“But in the bible it says that homosexuality is a sin. I don’t want to see someone like her burn in hell for this choice.”  
By this time they were parked in front of Cas’ house and Dean could take his eyes off the road and turn and face Castiel. “Cas,” Dean said sternly, his voice sharp and biting. “Charlie is a good person, she’s an amazing friend, and she’s happens to love women. She didn’t choose that, it’s just who she is. I don’t want to hear you speaking like that about my best friend. You are my friend too, but I’m not going to stand for this.”  
“I-I-I’m sorry Dean, that’s just what it says in the bible.”  
Dean was growing rather frustrated at this point and his anger had a way of running away from him sometimes. “What does your precious bible say about bisexual people. Am I damned because I’m bisexual or only if I end up with a man?”  
“You are…”  
“I am bisexual. You had no idea did you? Well I am and if you have a problem with it you can get out of my car and never speak to me again unless you have a change of heart.”  
Castiel’s mind was racing and he had no idea what to say. So he grabbed his backpack and without a word stepped out of the car and walked inside to his house. Dean watched him walk away with his hand tightly gripping the steering wheel. Why did he have to have feelings for someone he couldn’t have? He really liked Cas and this hurt him. He was angry but a small part of him really hoped that maybe Cas would come around, enough so at least they could remain friends. But he didn’t know if that was possible after his little blowout.


End file.
